When I lived in Wyoming (2001 – 2002), I got to know a lot of people, but I deliberately didn’t make too many good friends. My ex had a one-year visiting professor gig and because our time there was limited, I didn’t want to start friendships only to have to move on. But I couldn’t resist one of my yoga students, Marguerite. She was so nice and so much fun! Last year for my birthday she made me fridge magnets out of bottle caps with Beverly d’Angelo’s picture on them--that’s how good a friend she is! They’re in my cube at work or I’d post a picture. I will some other time.
Anyway, Marguerite once said that everyone should be able to kill one person in the course of their lives with absolutely no ensuing consequences. That's right, you get a pass for one murder.
Wow. Imagine how nice people would be? You’d be afraid to piss someone off in case they haven’t killed anyone yet. Be careful with the road rage—you never know. Cheating spouses? Both parties would be crazy! And the woman who used to cut her fingernails in the cubicle next to me? I can’t say for sure she’d live to see her year-end performance appraisal.*
So here are a couple of questions:
Given this scenario, would there still be a Get-Out-of-Jail-Free card in your wallet, or would that have been cashed in long ago? Who would you have used it on?
Is there anyone on your hit list right this minute?
Do you think someone might have offed you by now if they could get away with it?
* I'm kidding--I would probably save my One Free Murder ticket for a serial rapist/ax murderer chasing me. Or for someone who asks, "Are you gaining weight?" Or anyone who gives my book a bad review.