Yep, it’s time for some true confessions. I can think of three wince-inducing crushes right off the top of my head and amazingly, I don’t even file Prince Harry in that category. Or Billy Bob Thornton. (Not as the Slingblade character. What kind of freak do you think I am?)
Okay, here goes.
1. Glen Lerner. Unless you live in Vegas, you wouldn’t know who he is. I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I actually have a little crush on a lawyer who advertises on TV. Eeew-uh! Sometimes at work I have his jingle in my head: “Glen Lerner is the way to go. Call 877-1500.” Not good, huh?
It’s the dimples. Plus, he looks like a big old bear. And I detect a northeast accent—Boston, I think. Not as sexy as an English accent, or even a Brooklyn accent, but I’ll take it. (Yes, Brooklyn accents are very sexy.) "One call, that's all."
2. John McEnroe. Oh, please—he is cute as hell. I have a weakness for Irishmen, and though I’m not a fighter (I break up way before it gets to that point), I think we could really go at it.
“Fuck off!’And then after a few rounds of that, we’d have incredible makeup sex.
“No, you fuck off!”
“No, YOU fuck off!”
3. The Geico gecko. Yeah, I know—it’s a freakin' lizard. Did I not say these are embarrassing crushes??? And worst part is, when I’m fast-forwarding the DVR during the commercials, I will actually stop to watch the Geico commercials. It’s the accent. Plus I just know he’d play hard to get, which would both infuriate me and turn me on at the same time.
God help me. Yet another post that’s nothing to be proud of.
Oh, come on! You have an embarrassing crush, I know it. Spill it!