Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Ever give your kid the finger to the back of his head?

I keep thinking of the line in Louis CK's show Saturday night that went something like, "You're not a good parent unless you give your your kid the finger to the back of their head.  At least three times a week."   And he's not talking about teenagers, either.  He's talking about "the little asshole who makes everyone late because he won't put his shoes on."

Giving kids the finger to the back of their head?  Can you imagine?  Who would do such a thing?

A lot of us have, right?  That's why he got such a huge laugh. 

There's something delightfully passive-aggressive about behind-the-head finger-giving, no? I give Bastard Husband the finger behind his head on the very first page of my book. One of my friends routinely gives his boss the under-the-desk-finger. And then there's the old pointing-at-the-phone motion. Driving doesn't count; that's not behind the head.

How about you? Are you a secretive bird-flipper? (Yikes, what a horrible saying.) Who's your favorite target?  Ever give your own precious angels the finger to the back of their head? 
.

10 comments:

Tara said...

It's the times when I'm not so secretive about flipping the bird that seem to get me in trouble.... And yes, my precious angels get the finger to the back of the head quite frequently...

Emmas_Gold said...

I don't have kids. I have cats. I have never flipped them the bird, although the thought of it is pretty cool! Hee hee! No, they're great little dudes and definitely not Bastard Cats.

Half of every day is spent on the phone. The finger flip while I'm on the phone with some Bastard Caller? Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

Chocolate Covered Daydreams said...

Nope. Not the finger, only "the look".

drewzepmeister said...

Yeah, I give kid the secret flip. Not only that, the "look", the roll of eyes AND a lecture.

Vegas Linda Lou said...

Well... I guess we know which one of us is going to Chocolate Covered Heaven.

Wolfshead said...

Favorite target for the unseen ones are those characters who decide you need a lecture on something and drone on and on. They either get it while pacing and their back is turned or after they are done and are walking away. Of course I've also given such people one to the front of the head now and then which may be why I've had a number of jobs.

kay zee said...

If I am ever forced to sit and listen to someone who WON'T SHUT UP I draw "shut up" on my leg over and over with my finger.

Vegas Linda Lou said...

Brilliant!

Fragrant Liar said...

I've never once given my daughters the bird, unless it was in good fun, and then I did it to their faces. All four of them!

But I have in the past, under duress, called them bitches. Not to their faces, but they deserved it.

Anonymous said...

HUMMMMM? Finger to the back of the head? Could he have meant "thump"? I have given and still give my thirty year old daughter a "thump" to the back of the head when she is out of line, but the "bird/finger"? NO!

True story.
I sent my daughter to her room for some smart ass remark of some sort. She slammed the door. I could hear her seriously raging. I opened the door and she was standing on the other side of her bed, with her hands on her hips, sticking her tongue out at the door. Caught her in the act, busted! I laughed so hard I nearly peed my pants and she did too! The look on her face was priceless! Her door was taken of the hinges for a week, but her room was kept clean for a week. We laugh about it to this day.

Good times, good times.

jw