One of the last times I was back in Albany, my sister Lori and I went out for a few beers with our childhood friend Chuckie Bell. At one point he asked, “If you could change something about yourself—anything at all—what would it be?"
That was a no-brainer. “MY HAIR!” I exclaimed.
I have fine, thin, limp, crappy hair that flattens to my head about 30 seconds after I turn off the blow dryer. The actress Molly Shannon, star of my guilty pleasure Kath and Kim, once said, “I was born with three hairs on my head and I’ve spent my entire life trying to make them look like five.” I can so relate! Believe me, I thank God every day for a pretty face and a hot body, but at this age it’s about five minutes to midnight as far as they go, if you know what I mean. Pretty soon I’ll be SOL.
Lori went next and said something like, “I wish I could be more tolerant of other people.” Chuck’s answer was equally annoying.
Jesus, I thought. How freakin’ superficial am I? Yup, other than my hair, I pretty much have it all together. Sure, I’m the center of my own universe, I have absolutely no patience, I’m quick to judge, and when people don’t see things my way, I secretly think they’re mildly retarded. And I wish I could change… my hair? What an a-hole.
What about you? If you could change anything about yourself, what would it be? And be honest—give us your knee-jerk reaction; don’t go thinkin’ up some goody-goody Pollyanna response unless that’s really what comes to you. Though in that case, you're much too nice to be reading this blog.
Oops! I almost forgot...
HAPPY ST. PATRICK'S DAY!!! Lori sent me this pic of herself and her husband, Russ, taken at the parade in Albany last Saturday. Don't they look like fun?