Remember her wedding last month? Remember how she got this beautiful dress from The Deb, of all places? (Evidently it’s a very uncool place to shop if you’re over 15.)
Courtney: “So you know my wedding dress?”Well, you see that satiny sash around her 23-inch waist? Evidently the price tag of the dress is hidden under there. Evidently that was the plan all along.
Me: “Of course, sweetie. You looked so beautiful.”
Courtney: “Yeah, well, I brought it back to The Deb.”
Me: “You brought it back? What do you mean?”
Courtney: “I knew I was never gonna wear it again, so I thought what the hell, I’m gonna return it.”Over the phone, she couldn’t see my eyes rolling back to my cerebellum. But I have to admit, her reasoning is sound…
Me: “You brought back your wedding dress?”
Courtney: “Hell, yeah! I told them it didn’t fit and they totally gave me my money back. A hundred and fifty bucks! Woo-hoo!”
Courtney: “You know what they say, Mom. ‘Something old, something new, something borrowed… Well, I borrowed my dress from The Deb.”And evidently her underwear was blue.
If the TV execs don’t go for my reality show idea, which is brilliant, by the way, perhaps I can interest them in the Yankee-hippie version of Kath and Kim. We are so there.