Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Men are people, too

A couple of years ago, I wrote a piece entitled "Are Middle Aged Women Invisible?" for Living-Las-Vegas.com.  It was one of their most popular posts.  Here's an excerpt. 
Even in the best of circumstances, middle age can be a trying time for women. Do a Google search and you’ll find countless books, articles and blogs lamenting that once women turn 40, they start to become invisible – not just to men, but to society in general. In our youth-obsessed culture, they say, gals my age are no longer considered attractive, so we remain under the radar, as if the world stops seeing us as part of humanity.
In the article, I go on to say that I never quite bought into that “Invisible Woman Syndrome” and I fancy myself as the type who would bloom wherever she’s planted. I don't know why, but I've always had a (somewhat annoying) sense of self-confidence and the related sense of self-worth. 

That said, I've still had my share of times when I'd look in the mirror in thorough disgust.  I'm too fat, I hate my hair... whatever.  Crazy shit.  Funny, the older I get, the better I feel about myself and my sense of attractiveness.  But I'm a total weirdo.  Probably delusional.

Anyway, women tend to think we have the lock on such neurotic-ness.  We believe men age gracefully and that it's a snap for them to attract women, even those much younger than they are.  Aging is a breeze for men, huh?  Hell, life is a breeze for men, right?


I'd like you to check out my friend Ray's R. Jacob Post, specifically yesterday's entry.  You'll get a glimpse into one man's perspective that, quite honestly, women don't get to see very often. 

Sometimes we forget that men are people, too.  Ray's post is a poignant reminder.


linda said...

It's too often presumed that men are just hunky dory with things.

Human beings are what men and women are. With feelings. Aging is not gender specific. Neither is feeling lonely and unwanted.

Christopher Chandler said...

When I was younger, I was considered attractive by many women. I guess proof of that would be I had no problem finding women to date, enjoy sex with, hang out with, etc. Couple years ago I'm walking down busy LA street with younger handsome male friend. We passed a lot of women. They all checked him out. Not one looked at me. Rather depressing. The years have brought me much experience, wisdom and hopefully a better sense of humor and a greater appreciation about this crazy adventure called life. Sadly, in many women's eyes, those characteristics take second place to "six-pack abs" and a large bank account.

Anonymous said...

It all comes down to expression. A woman expresses herself over and over and over until quite frankly some of us wish she'd go mute. Ok, maybe that's just me. LOL But, men on the other hand aren't known for their chattiness. It's not like men go around talking about their feelings. So when a rare man writes a blog or is in touch with his "innerbitch" it's refreshing and gives much needed insight. But, God forbid you tell your man that you read a man's post about manly issues and you now understand him better, because then you will be accused of cheating. LOL Ok, I will stop being the know-it-all and go off to read the post.

Vicky De Leo said...

I didn't realize I was an invisible middle aged woman until I was sitting with my teenage daughter in the DMV. A very good looking man started a conversation with me. After a few minutes, I realized he was chatting up the mother to get close to the girl.