Olfactory pleasure at the Stone Temple Pilots show

What? WHAT?

Sorry, I’m still having trouble hearing after Thursday night’s Stone Temple Pilots concert at the new Joint in the Hard Rock. My friend Joanna was nice enough to offer me a free ticket, and I certainly wasn’t going to pass it up—thank you, Joanna! The new venue is awesome—not a whole lot bigger than the old Joint, but much nicer and you don’t have to leave the place to use the bathrooms, which is a big improvement.

LA-based rockers Hurt played a good, solid opening set and I actually liked them better than the headliner. Unfortunately, turnout for Hurt was pretty sparse, but the crowd thickened by the time STP took the stage. And holy cow, did it ever reek in there! My days of tokin’ are long over, but I have to admit, I love the smell of reefer. As I stood there taking in that lovely aroma, a couple of funny thoughts passed through my brain, like how I once I spent an entire afternoon searching the Internet for hemp-scented perfume.

Of course, I was at work. Don’t tell anybody, but several years ago I had a technical writing contract job that was a bit of a joke in that I really didn’t have much to do. But you know how it is—if you tell anyone you don’t have much to do, they’ll find stuff for you and I can guarantee it’ll be the crap nobody else wants to work on, so it’s best to keep your mouth shut and just look busy. And so one day, after telling a girlfriend at lunch about how much I love the smell of ganja, I had a mission and spent the rest of the afternoon “busy” doing research. There’s no shortage of products out there.

Oh, wouldn’t it be hysterical to show up to work some morning smelling like dope? Imagine chairing a meeting at the top your game, explaining product specifications and marketing predictions, emanating the sweet scent of cannabis and then going, “Sorry, I need to take this” when your Grateful Dead ring tone goes off. Think of the possibilities: baby showers, dental appointments, job interviews, business networking events... You’d be perfectly straight and totally articulate; you’d just freakin' reek.

I’m bad, but you know what else I was thinking about during the show? The time my daughter, Courtney, came home from her first unchaperoned concert and announced, “That place smelled like Dad’s jewelry box.”

Happy Fourth of July! My BFF Lisa Gioia-Acres invited me to a VIP party tonight at the Santa Fe casino up in the northwest part of town. I'll have a full report on Tuesday...