Standing on my balcony last week I thought, "Gee, that lion out by the pool is kind of boring, all white and everything."
Upon closer look, I concluded the poor thing was in dire need of a makeover.
Mmmm. Well, I happen to have a little bit of time on my hands these days, so I took a trip to Michael's craft store to buy some supplies. I spent a whole freakin' day transforming that poor lion into what can only be described as a work of art.
Look at him now!
I can only imagine what the neighbors think.
The face was the hardest part. At one point I had a red-eyed evil lion face going on, and I thought, "Jesus H, I don't want to scare the kids." It was so funny I almost peed my pants from laughing so hard. In the end, I came up with this face.
The hearts on his nose and chin and the nail polish give him a much softer look, don't you think?
If Mike doesn't already think I'm nuts, he certainly does now. When I told him I was going to paint the thing, he replied with his standard, "Whatever you want, my love." And then when I spent hour upon hour applying layer upon layer of color on it, he realized he was in new territory and probably wondered what the hell he's gotten himself into.
Mike had never even heard of me painting anything but a bookshelf, and the truth is, I'm not an artist. At all. I just bought some paints and started fooling around with no real plan in mind. Just like in real life, when I got to a point where I didn't like where it was going, I changed course and tried something different.
There's a lot to be learned from my little surge of creativity. I'm sure a "real" artist would go, "That's a total piece of shit," but who cares? No one does anything perfectly right out of the gate, and there's always going to be someone who can do better than you can. So what? I had a ball with it, and the kids love it. The 11-year-old told me, "I knew you're a writer, but I didn't know you could do that!" Hahahaha!
The truth is, it actually came out better than I expected. I now sit at the kitchen table and laugh at its goofiness, which is a lot better than saying, "We gotta get rid of that goddamn thing." It's cool now. And now I have one more thing for my resume.
Okay, maybe not quite yet.