Saturday, May 5, 2012

Nope, I am definitely not a feminist

(I'm writing this in a hurry, so forgive any grammar mistakes.)  (That means you, Mom.) :)

I so love the comments you left on my last post.  Today I want to talk about the double standard when it comes to the notion that "sex sells" and why we see so many half-to-mostly naked women in advertisements and selling things in real life and hardly any seductive men.

First, let's face it:  It's a man's world.  I realized this back in 1991 when they delayed the broadcast of The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson to tell us that Magic Johnson had AIDS.  I'm sure he's a lovely man, but Magic Johnson was just one of many equally famous sports stars--it wasn't like, holy shit, the greatest athlete of all time has AIDS.  I remember thinking, what woman would be so important that the announcement of her disease would necessitate the delay of the Johnny Carson show?  Over 20 years later, I still don't have an answer to that question.

Don't get me wrong--I love men.  LOVE!  They are fucking awesome.  But it's not lost on me that they're ultimately running the show.  And guess what?  Men aren't so keen on seeing other men half naked.  (Unless they're gay, but it's safe to say they're not the ones I'm referring to as being in control.)  So that's one reason why (female) sex sells. 

Another reason why we don't see men selling their wares in Speedos is--and let me know if I'm wrong about this--women are simply not that turned on by the perfect male form.

Let me explain, and keep in mind this is coming only from my own perspective.  The male body in itself means nothing to us because a body is just a body; women don't get turned unless there's an emotional attachment.  Even when I was single, I never had any desire to see the Chippendale's or Thunder Down Under.  Why would I  be fawning over someone I didn't even know?  Besides that, too-perfect male bodies are intimidating to us; we're not secure enough about our own bodies to be with, or even appreciate from afar, a guy's body that's too sculpted.  Not to mention, we also presume there's underlying ego issues beneath all those muscles and all that time in the gym that we simply don't want to deal with.  Real men have meat--and fat--on their bones!

Seriously, give me a guy with a gut any day.  To me, that's the sexiest part of a man.  I remember when the Crocodile Hunter died and they were showing a clip of him wrestling a croc in the water and his shirt came up and revealed his stomach--I was like, god-damn, that's hot!  Manly, yes!

Whew!  Now, where was I?  Oh, yeah.  One more thing.  Women--and I'm talking straight women, not just lesbians--would much rather see a hot female body.  When we see an amazingly shaped female, we're blown away because we know what it takes to achieve that, whether it's by disciplined diet and exercise or sheer luck with the gene pool.  It's no secret that women look at other women more than we look at men.  As I say in my book, I'm not going to learn any beauty tips from a 230-pound rugby player.  But they do have their place...

So I guess the bottom line is, women are the tits. And that's why we see so many of them.  Don't you agree?


grrouchie said...

preach on sista

raydenzel1 said...

oh, I love the way you think!
love the swimsuit picture at the top. you are wearing a swimsuit, right? lol

lightning36 said...

"Seriously, give me a guy with a gut any day. To me, that's the sexiest part of a man."

Well at least you'll find tons o' sexy looking guys using that definition. And to think that I am now working on NOT being a hottie! ; o )

It is true that guys are soooo much more visual, so yeah -- keep those female bodies coming under any circumstaces. Heck -- most men are not even that discriminating. Show us some skin and we are happy. It's not like we are gonna look away.

Like Elaine said on Seinfeld: "The female body is a work of art. The male body is utilitarian. It’s for gettin’ around. It’s like a Jeep."

Rob said...

Excellent post, Linda, well said. The simple fact of life is that Men are a lot more visually stimulated than women are. Another way to say that is, MEN

Another example of what you are saying, look at the covers of the so-called Women's Magazines. They expect women to buy Cosmo, but the cover always seems aimed at me! Why is that? Also, a lot more men are bothered by seeing semi-naked, well built men than women are looking at semi-naked, well built women.

Just one thing about the Magic Johnson thing, though it's not really the main point of your post. Magic really was huge then, and the fact that he had contracted, specifically, AIDS back then made it a really major story. Because it was AIDS and because that seemed to mean he was either a drug user or gay. I recall for many months there was huge speculation about which it was, because it seemed so unlikely he would have gotten it from a woman. That plus the fact that at that time it seemed like a death sentence for such a hugely popular and quite young star made it the story of the year.

Carmel said...

I totally agree with you on almost all counts except I think there are some women out their that love to ogle perfect male forms. I sure do! Everytime I go to Pirahna I make sure to slip the hotess dancer there $20 in exchange for squeezing his naughty bits. That being said a chubby guy has a much if not more sex appeal for me especially if he has confidence. If you have less than socially accepted "good looks" and you don't care because you know you're the shit, that's hot. Same goes for ladies. I'm no delicate flower or conventionally "pretty" but I'm the shit anyway.

Mimi said...

I think you're spot on!

Taradharma said...

perhaps one of the reasons that sexploitation of the female form bothers me is precisely because it reminds me that men are in control. you've hit the nail on the head.

in print and broadcast media, one can easily see who wields the power. And it aint women, or blacks or browns.

i'm feeling humorless about this tonight. but i still love your blog.

Debbie said...

Everything you say is absolutely true but it still bums me out that women allow themselves to be objectified. What gets lost in the sexualization is that women are minimized and reduced to T&A and that is sad to me because women really are the smarter, stronger, more intuitive sex.


The Vegas Flea said...


You should really go to Sturgis some year. That should definitely be on your bucket list.

Gina D. said...

Your friend Debbie took the words out of my mouth. You may be right, but I find it depressing and frustrating that women continually get objectified and treated as something less than a person (e.g. pretty sure if I were male, my boss would be a hell of a lot less likely to call me "beautiful" or "sweets" at work). Anyway, those frustrations, and the fact that I think women should be treated as humans, is how I know I am a feminist.

Vegas Linda Lou said...

@ grrouchie: I do get preachy...

@ Ray: Um, YES, I'm wearing a swimsuit!

@ lightning36: You make a good point about men not being that discriminating. We women are so hard on ourselves--we can't stand that our bodies aren't perfect, when men couldn't care less about physical perfection. They're much more accepting than we give them credit.

@ Rob: Good insight into the Magic Johnson story. When I lived in Utah, they used to shield the cover of Cosmo with a black piece of plastic so as not to corrupt people in line at the grocery store. Utah... don't miss that!

@ Carmel: I agree--confidence means a lot. Although too much (cockiness) is a turnoff.

@ Mimi: Thanks!

@ Tara: Yeah, the men are definitely in control.

@ Debbie and Gina: I know what you mean about women being objectified for their bodies, but I think if there's other things going on (like brains and a sense of humor), it can all be put into perspective. That's a shitty response, I know. I really need to put more thought into the issue. And I'm totally with you about a boss calling a woman "Sweets." NO WAY is that good.

@ Vegas Flea: You KNOW Sturgis is gonna happen for me one of these years!