Saturday, February 13, 2010

Great news in my family!

You know how I have two aunts named Joyce, right? Well, had. My father’s sister, Beautiful Aunt Joyce, passed away last June, remember? That’s not the great news. No, the great news is, you’re not going to believe this... her husband, my uncle John, is getting married tomorrow.

I know! It’s tempting to rush to judgments and assumptions. Like jeez, couldn’t they have waited at least a year and he probably had her waiting in the wings. On that second count, I assure you nothing could be further from the truth.

Joyce and John got married on June 3, 1967; my sister Lori and I were flower girls in their wedding. They were 21 years old. Joyce died 2 days before their 42nd anniversary and I can tell you no man ever demonstrated more devotion to his wife than John; he couldn’t have been more loving in his care for her during her illness. Here they are when Lori and I visited at Christmas 2008.

That was Joyce’s last surge of remission; soon after she had surgery to combat the cancer that had spread to her brain and after that she never regained her footing.

Shortly after Joyce’s death, John told me that he’d lost his parents nine days apart and had attended his brother’s funeral just two months before Joyce’s, but nothing could have prepared him for the loss of his wife. It was hard to imagine him alone in their beautiful country home in the woods outside Jim Thorpe, PA; a house my aunt had meticulously decorated and that held her physical imprint after she was gone.

Last summer John reconnected with a former co-worker (John took an early retirement from his position as a Ph.D.-level chemical engineer), a woman named Dolores whom I believe he’d met almost 30 years ago. And tomorrow they’re getting married, on Valentine’s Day.

Too soon? Why wait, I say. Nothing is going to bring my aunt back. Joyce was truly the nicest person on earth and I know she would never want her beloved to suffer with grief. Who knows—maybe in some kind of cosmic way, she was instrumental in getting them together.

So here’s to you, John and Dolores! May you enjoy good health and happiness together for many, many years. I believe there’s an angel in your corner cheering you on.

9 comments: said...

I totally one finds true love and when it happens is not for others to judge. He will always carry the love of his Joyce with him.

He deserves to live his life in love once again and happy. I wish them well. May they have many, many wonderful years together.

Fragrant Liar said...

I'm with you too. You want to know someone grieved for your loved one, but beyond that, death is so finite. Not to say that it isn't heartbreaking, but you KNOW they're gone and not coming back, so it seems more acceptable for the heart to heal right up and get on with life, including a new love.

Divorce, now that's different. He should suffer till long after you're gone. Am I right???

I Hate to Weight said...

what a wonderful love story -- each of them.

it gives me peace to know there's always love

Julie D said...

Love has no time table. Congrats to John and Dolores. May they have many happy years together.

linda said...

I agree. Who knows what discussions they had leading up to her passing away. She probably wanted him to find someone and be happy after she was gone. And after just on 42 years together, well, I think it would be hard to be alone.

I hope they are both happy.

Bar L. said...

Awesome! I wish them the very best possible!!!! :)

gayle said...

It is so wonderful that your Uncle John could find happiness again!

Perplexio said...

My sister's mother-in-law died of cancer back in the early 90s. Her father-in-law married an old family friend who'd lost her husband a few years before within a couple of years after his wife's passing.

Some people need that companionship and others can't imagine ever being with anyone other than the spouse they lost. Difrn't strokes for difrn't folks. Not about to rush into judgment either way.

Anonymous said...

Congrats to John and Dolores!

When love finds you you just know.