Monday, February 22, 2010

I may be a granny, but damn, I love those biker bars!

There’s no better way to spend a Sunday afternoon than listening to some kick-ass rock n roll in a biker bar. Last Sunday my sister Lori Biker and I took at ride down to the Pioneer Saloon in Goodsprings, about 25 miles south of Las Vegas. Here's Lori out front.

Man, did we have fun! I’ve written about this place before; I dragged my BFF Lisa Gioia-Acres down there last spring (on Easter Sunday, of all days!), but the scene was much more crazy this time.

Here’s Monica, the bar manager, doling out a shot to one of her on-duty bartenders. Doing shots at work (without having to sneak them) -- that’s the kind of job I want!

I interviewed Monica for this article. She’s just a little bit of a thing. “Where does someone that size keep all her internal organs?” Lori wondered. No shit—she must be all of 98 pounds. Oh, what could it be like to wear a belly shirt and not have people turn away in horror?

Now I ask you, doesn’t this look like a swingin’ time?

This is why I love the biker bars. Everyone is friendly, unpretentious, and accepting—of other people and themselves. No one gives a shit if you're having a crappy hair day (is there any other kind?) or if your gut hangs over your belt; it’s all good as long as you’re smiling. And you know what I say--when you're laughing your ass off, no one cares how big it is.

Look at these two new friends we made.

I forget their names, but he’s 67 and she’s 54! And you wouldn’t believe the bodies on the both of them. His chest was rock hard (don’t ask me how I know) and she has, without a doubt, one of the all-time best asses I’ve ever seen. Check it out.

Hey, Saturday night I got to meet my incorrigibly fun-loving “daughter” of the blogosphere, Tara from Ohio. I love this kid—what a spirit! And talk about gorgeous--such a pretty girl. She and Hurricane Mikey came to my show Saturday night. Great fun!

Well, Mom left Sunday and Lori was supposed to go back to Albany yesterday, but well, you know how it goes. You check the monitor to make sure the flight’s on schedule and then you play some slots and do some shopping… except Lori looked at someone else’s flight time because when she got to the gate, the doors to the plane were already closed. Meant to be—an extra night in Vegas!

Lori’s leaving tomorrow (supposedly--ha!) and then on Wednesday her husband, Russ, arrives with our brother, Steven. Yep, it’s NASCAR weekend. They’ll be here until next Tuesday. When you live in Vegas, you do get visitors.

Busy, busy...


Anonymous said...

That bar is kind of Coyote Ugly-ish. LOVE IT!!!!

And damn that girl that is 54 is freaking hot. I WANT to look like that at 54!!!

Hurricane Mikey said...

I'll take a can of spray-tan for $10, Alex...

Tara said...

Why doesn't Mikey look happier?? I mean he's got a hot chick on each side! Seriously though, it was great finally getting to meet you in person Vegas Mom :)

Fragrant Liar said...

I do love a good biker bar sometimes too. Have a few down here in Texas, dontcha know . . .

Just getting to reading your book, sister. OMG, I am loving it!

Julie D said...

You didn't take ME to that bar? Granted I'm not as hot as Lori Biker but c'mon!

Cameron said...

ok, that looks like the best sunday EVER. i bet even i could walk in with a midriff top on with my 7 mos pregnant ass and nobody would say boo.

rock on!