I was a sophomore in the old Albany High School, which was down on lower Western Avenue. One day in the cafeteria after lunch, a friend of mine asked if she could borrow a nickle. She wasn't in my inner circle of friends, but I'd known her since elementary school and she was nice enough.
I had thirty-five cents on me, just enough for bus fare. I gave her a nickle, knowing I'd now have to walk nearly a mile and a half home after school.
"Thanks," she said. "Now I can have an ice cream sandwich and take the bus home."
I didn't ask for the nickle back, and I didn't enjoy the walk home that day, either. But I did learn that sometimes you have to speak up for yourself; sometimes you can be too nice. For a mere nickle, I sure got my money's worth in terms of lessons learned.
P.S. I saw her last summer while I was in Albany. I'm totally thinner, probably because I got in that extra exercise.
5 comments:
ah, ice cream revenge!
I do know what you are talking about. I have done that in high school and with some other friends in the past. I never did see any of the money back from any of them. I learned who to trust and who not to trust. A couple of the people have asked me for money again and I told them no you already owe me money and they said they paid me back and I told them they never did and they got mad at me and told me to never talk to them again. But then a couple weeks later they are calling me and asking me for money again. I told them to stay out of my life for good.
Well, it's basic survival skills I learned from watching Baywatch.
If you are a lifeguard treading water with to an unconscious victim in your arms in rough waters & are up against the rocks, you must place the victim between you and the rocks. Otherwise, you will both sink.
Same for being on the airplane & the oxygen masks fall down. You have precious seconds to put your mask on first before you can assist others. Otherwise those precious seconds count and you both could pass out.
Always make sure you have what you need first & can spare it. Don't cut yourself short on paying your rent by waiting for someone to pay you back. As a matter of fact - NEVER LEND ANYONE MONEY UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES! That's one guaranteed way to lose a friend!
This situation isn't that different from bums in the street begging for change. Oh sure it pulls at your heartstrings "Save the homeless", but there is also the possibility they are also dishonest about what they really need that money for - even if you asked them. Some are conartists, some use the money for booze, meth, heroin, gambling, etc. Some use it for food. Some use it for gas. Who knows? That's the risk you take. Plus if the money is used for less than stellar reasons, I do not believe in rewarding their bad behavior.
Me personally? I just ignore them all without even engaging in conversation. If it is a salesperson or someone with better manners, I will still not break my stride with no eye contact and give a polite, "No thank you."
No societal guit trips for me.
i never lend money -- if i give someone money, i assume i will never see it again. i don't give it unless i can do without it forever. if it comes back, i'm very pleasantly surprised.
when i give it, i have no expectation of how it's spend. i never get mad if i hear that the person recently went on a shopping spree, even though my money was never returned.
amazing that you ran into this woman. i don't think i'd recognize anyone i went to college with!
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