Yesterday at work I conducted a mini training session on how to overcome procrastination. I know--blind leading the blind, right? One of the tips I gave was to approach a task in chunks; tell yourself you'll work on something for just a half hour and then reward yourself so you associate the task with pleasure, not pain.
“For example,” I began, “to motivate myself to exercise, I say ‘I’m only gonna do it for 30 minutes and then I can reward myself with a beer.’”
I swear to God, that’s the crap I spout off at work. And they love me.
When I first started this job three years ago, I reported to a little Chinese guy who conducted weekly department meetings that were simply intolerable. Everyone sat at a giant conference table and each of us had to blah, blah, blah report on what we’d done since the previous meeting. At seven o’clock in the friggin’ morning, and as if anyone cared. I always had something inane to say, and most of the time I’d just make shit up, but one morning I was truly excited about a training session I'd held.
“It was great!” I gushed. “And this project was a big fuckin—“
“That totally slipped!” I exclaimed, but everyone was laughing too hard to hear any excuses. I swear to God, I don’t know how many people came up to me during that day, high five-ing me and saying stuff like, “I love working with you!” I was like, “You gotta be kidding. I’m a total a-hole” but they would have no part of it—they thought I was the tits. Ha!
So I do these little mini trainings like "Overcoming Procrastination" and "Ten Steps to More Effective Meetings" on a monthly basis now. They’re light and fluffy, but they get people out of their cubicles and I’m pretty sure my co-workers come out of them with one or two decent takeaways.
I always put together a little handout and I try to find a cartoon or something funny to stick on it to keep the mood upbeat. This is what I put on yesterday's handout.
Oh, but if only I had the balls to insert this little gem. I have a feeling I'd be voted Employee of the Year.
If only I had the balls...