Thursday, December 17, 2009

Mark my words: Bastard Husband will never be a Cirque de Solei production

You know how sometimes you know you’re not going to like something and then you talk yourself into having an open mind and so you give it a try? Well, I’ve been living in Las Vegas for six and a half years and had yet to see any of the Cirque de Soleil shows because, for one, I think they’re too expensive and I’d rather spend my money on other stuff and two, I couldn’t imagine that I’d like that type of production.

A couple of weeks ago my dear friend Lisa Gioia-Acres called to tell me she got her hands on some tickets to see LOVE at the Mirage for only twenty-five bucks and wanted to know if I’d be interested in going with her. “Of course,” I told her. If there was one Cirque show I kind of wouldn’t mind seeing it was that one, plus I’d never pass up the chance to hang out with Lisa. And so last night was time to pop my Cirque cherry.

Well… in the cinematic classic What About Bob? (possibly the best movie ever made), the hero proclaims there are two types of people in life: those who like Neil Diamond and those who don’t. The same applies to Cirque de Soleil.

I think Neil Diamond wrote some pretty good songs, but as far as LOVE goes, the flamboyant movie reviewer in the old Living Colour TV show said it best: “Hated it!” The Beatles music was great and the sound was amazing, but enough of the jumping and prancing around! After about five minutes of that, I was like, yeah, I get it—now go sit down. I swear, I had my eyes closed three-quarters of the time because I couldn’t stand all the commotion. Honestly, I felt completely over-stimulated.

Lisa and I could not be more different—she’s an all-natural earth mother who finds nothing more relaxing than cuddling up with a couple of feral cats and, well, you know me. I’ve told you before I’m not an animal person and the only things I buy at Whole Foods are hair dye and beer. So of course, she thought the show was fantastic.

“Don’t you wonder how they do everything?” she gushed.

I responded with, “That’s what they do—they have a way of figuring that stuff out.” What a Cirque Scrooge, huh?

So I’m filing Cirque de Soleil under “What the rest of the world seems to love, but I can’t stand.” Yep, right there along with Julia Roberts, guacamole, and the Lord of the Rings crap.

And now they have an Elvis Cirque. Because you know you can't think of Elvis and not think of aerial acrobatics. God help us.

How about you? What makes you feel completely out of sync with the rest of the world?


Tara said...

I agree with you and your take on Cirque completely. Also, that Twilight shit, I can't get into it. Hmmm, what else..... Coffee, can't stand it and everyone I work with thinks I'm nutty because I drink iced tea instead. I could go on and on here.....

Lisa Gioia-Acres said...

Read my take on the show and our connection! I am still laughing about how differently we experienced the show. And for the record, I hated the show, "What About Bob!" But, I love you.

Rochelle said...

I've never been too keen on seeing a Cirque de Solei show either - their contortions kind of scare me.

As for other things I am out of sync with: I don't like beer of any kind - just missing the beer lovers tastebud I guess (but I've more than made up for it with a red wine lovers tastebud!).

Andi said...

I was that way about "Cats." It was horrible. What the heck does everyone else see in it?

Tom Bradley Jr. said...

...I'm sorry, did you say Cirque du PrĂ©tentieux and its newest production, "Merde d’avant-garde"?

Vegas Linda Lou said...

@ Tara: I'm with you on the Twilight shit.

@ Lisa: You never told me you don't like What About Bob? NOW, I have to rethink our friendship.

@ Slacker: You don't like beer? You poor thing!

@ Andi: You couldn't pay me to see Cats. Or pet one in real life.

@ Tom: Oui, c'est ce que j'ai dit. Exactement.

Hurricane Mikey said...

Yeah, I'm firmly in the camp that thinks that What About Bob was one of the stupidest movies EVAR, but you knew that already. And you know my thoughts on Neil Young too.

It's a wonder you hang out with me at all! But I'm with ya on the whole Lord of the Rings thing. I actually got up and left the theatre in the first one. Just couldn't take it after the first hour.

Julie D said...

Go see Zumanity. Much more sex, much less jumping around.

Anonymous said...

I agree with you...although I haven't seen LOVE, why would I want to pay top $ to see a bunch of French clowns dancing around to Beatles tunes?

My husband & I once scored free tickets to see Le Reve - my first & only Cirque show. It was ok, but not the E"nd All Be All" that would justify the $125 price tag.

Anonymous said...

I've poured over hundreds of photos from the new City Center, and quite frankly, most of it does not impress me in the least! Appears cold & not engaging to the viewer. Giant erasers? A hodge podge of colored cut glass masqueradng as "sculpture"? Weird, crazy beakers of swirling water are the new fountains of Crystals (soon to be known as "Crystal Meth" one year from now when this thing tanks.)

But I'll pay a visit sometime next week to see if there is something that catches my eye at Sickly Center...

Still think Fashion Show is impressive with it futuristic design on multi levels. Enjoy the sunken/raised fashion showcase. Love walking through the giant spoon & fork (which are appropriate here as one exits the food court)and descends outdoors under the blinking canopy to view the tourist activity below.

Also love Red Rock. Pretty & modern inside & out!

Bar L. said...

You don't like guacamole

Just teasin ya. I don't like lots of popular things.

For one, I hate shopping, trends and styles. Just leave me alone and let me spend my money on important things like music, books and techie gadgets :)

I'm not one for any kind of musical but I might like Cirque, never went but would go for free.

My cousin is living up there for 6 months and I am thinking of driving up to see him (haven't seen him in about 30 years!) so if I do you'll be seeing my smiling face soon. I'll keep you posted.

Anonymous said...

Funny Linda YOU said Neil Diamond and Mikey wrote about his feelings on Neil Young! ---- now there is a
juxtaposed, pair of singers from my 1970's era. By the way love the blog. Norm

The Vegas Flea said...

I've lived here in Las Vegas about three years. I haven't seen a Cirque show for the exact same reasons. Although, I probably should someday, as I am a part-time stagehand for crying out loud. But, I don't see it happening til someone hands me a ticket.

As far as being out of sync with the rest of the world, the list is way too long to post

But, I can start with music. I don't like Bruce Springsteen, Tom Petty, U2 (especially hate them) and Dave Matthews.

Unknown said...

My daughter, a former gymnast, really wants to see one of them. I'm wondering if she'd feel the same way?

I guess I'm out of sync with the Twilight series and Harry Potter. Never found an interest in either of them.

Andrea said...

Everytime I think about any of those Cirque shows I yawn with boredom. Maybe I'm not "cultured" enough, but those shows just seem so incredibly boring and overrated. I also do not understand why everyone loves Oprah, and Ellen. Ellen is not funny and Oprah is a narcissist blowhard. I agree with VegasFlea, Dave MatthewsBand--don't get it. Twilight and Harry Potter is ridiculous to me, I just don't see the appeal that these books/movies have for *adults*...I guess I'm just stooopid!

Oh and PS. I've let 3 of my girlfriends borrow BH and they all LOVED it. I told them to quit being cheapasses and buy the book and also to give feedback on Amazon. Have a great weekend :)

Drew said...

Wow! Jill and I saw Mystere. She liked it, but I found myself dozing off a few times. I think there is too much stuff going on for my small brain to absorb. So it just decideds to close itself down. I liked What about Bob. However we did walk out on the Lord of the Rings. My kids love it.
And that is all I have to say about that.

Vegas Linda Lou said...

@ Drew: Glad to hear you liked What About Bob?--that Hurricane Mikey doesn't have a clue, although I, too, walked out on Lord of the Rings. I was watching it in a theater in a shopping mall in New Zealand, and I thought, I can't believe I'm sitting here when I could be doing some good Kiwi shopping.

@Andrea: Thanks so much for passing my book on to your friends! Don't worry if they don't buy it--word of mouth is everything and has a way of taking care of actual sales. And thanks again for the review on Amazon!

@ Vegas Flea: I can kind of see U2 being on your list now, but the 80s U2 with the Eno/Lanois influence? Really? And you're Irish...

@ Barbara: Yes, come to Vegas! You know you have an open invitation to stay with me!

Mike Dennis said...

Say Hallelujah!!! Someone who doesn't think Cirque du Soleil represents the highest achievement of human creativity!

Since I started coming out to Las Vegas in 1998, and right through my move out here in 2006, I've heard nothing, and I mean NOTHING from Las Vegans about Cirque du Soleil except how totally awesome it is. Ahhh, the spectacle, they say. "You have to see 'Mystere', oh and don't forget 'O'. I've seen them each four times!" At $150 a pop? Are you kidding me?

"Love" was acrobats jumping around to Beatles music. Nothing more. Just acrobats.

Way to go, Linda. In fact, I'm so on fire about this that I'm going to write a blog about it on my own website, and reference yours in the first paragraph.

Lori Biker said...

I think the world is a better place because James Taylor is in it and thought everyone did. This week I learned that a few people very close to me can't stand him. One of them is your son, who also makes the world a better one. I have to think about this.

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